Monthly Archives: May 2012

Fake it till you make it

I am good at job interviews. When I was being interviewed for the job as Assistant Warden, I was asked if I could speak Irish. In my cockiest voice, putting on my richest brogue, I said “Tá Gaeilge agam”. The … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The Haunted House of Frozen Spoons

I had lots of distractions this weekend and so, thank God, I didn’t spend that much time in my now empty flat. I was working all weekend. I was meant to go to “Bearovision”, an event where larger, hairier gay … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Bereft

I feel overdramatically sad. It’s as if someone has scrubbed my soul with a steel pot scourer. I’m alone in House 79.01. My boys have gone. But we did good goodbyes. And for almost the first time in my life, … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

My PhD

Today I am far, far closer to getting a PhD than I was yesterday. Last night, at 1:00 in the morning, I sat in the Postgraduate 24-hour Reading Room and printed my chapters for my exam next week. They’re a … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Hope

Last week I wrote a post called “Fear”. I feel very differently today. Full of sweet, juicy hope. Hope can destroy you. Sometimes hope is much more damaging than despair. I would probably be a much happier person if I … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

My boys

My awfully big adventure is about to end. Over the next seven days, the boys are leaving Hall. I remember when I first moved here. I was excited and terrified. And I stayed terrified for a long time. They seemed … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Fear

I’m afraid. I’m afraid to go home. I still haven’t figured out how to be gay and be part of my family. I keep crying when I hear my father’s voice on the night I came out. He asked me, … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment