Scurry, scurry little (clinically obese) squirrel

Not unusually for a Monday, I was slow off the mark this morning. I ended up having to drive to work (a four-minute spin). Luckily, I got my walk in through no choice of my own. I had to go to Bolton Street after lunch to pay the first month’s rent on the (I know you’re sick of hearing about it) rundown little cottage. I then had a 5:00 Cambridge oral examining standardisation meeting. I walked down to Bolton Street, having rung the estate agent first to let her know that I was coming. The estate agent is a brisk and brusque country woman from Co. Mayo, the type you know disapproves of you before you even speak. It’s not a terribly long walk (45 minutes). The office was closed when I arrived. There were three other people waiting, including one man, who doesn’t trust this formidable country woman. He was convinced that she was hiding from him, as she hadn’t let either of the flats he advertised with her two weeks ago. She wasn’t answering her phone to any of us. I do hope she hasn’t done a runner with my deposit and is now loved up back in Mayo, sipping Mojitos on my hard-earned cash.

Anyway, I had to get back to my standardisation. I was going to be late. So I took a shortcut. Anyone who knows me well, knows that I have the sense of direction of a visually challenged wombat on crack. Shortcuts are not a good idea for me. As I walked up and down tiny lanes somewhere in the general Drumcondra area, I sweated buckets and I have no doubt that my heart was at the optimal rate for fatburning. I eventually emerged, unscathed – and undoubtedly lighter – going the wrong way down the North Circular Road.

If you’ve never been to an oral examiner standardisation, then you have no reason to be virtuous, as you have no concept of what Hell is truly like. After watching your 117th video of a Swiss girl giving her vapid opinions on facilities for young people in her town and agonising over whether she deserves a 3 or a 3.5 for interactive communication, your will to live crumbles. Even with this minimal willpower, I didn’t have a single one of the free biscuits on offer.

My battle with cigarettes continues. I’m giving up on the whole cold turkey thing tomorrow and investing in some nicorette.

Also, I’m not doing any strength training tonight. After coming home from standardisation, I planned my lessons for tomorrow, and slumped in front of the telly. It’s Monday, and I’ve exercised enough for today.

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2 Responses to Scurry, scurry little (clinically obese) squirrel

  1. Sinead says:

    Oh Connor! Standardisation – I empathise. I did PET and KET in one day! And it was a Saturday! I dug into the free biscuits, I can tell you! Well done so far. A few setbacks, but you're doing really well. Keep up the good work! baci xxx

  2. Pingback: In which a minor calamity befalls your hero, through no fault of his own | Project Connor

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